Important Decision
There are many important decisions made in life. In the past 4 days, I had been at a cross road. There was one very important decision waiting to be made.
Mentally I was quite tired. I had been thinking about it again and again weighting the pros and cons on the possible outcomes. To be honest, I needed view points from people who are closed to me. I needed their advises and importantly their support.
I might be wrong or I might be correct. I thought I needed an answer. As my stress became intense, I realised, all I needed was a supportive voice. Someone who could understand me, willing to walk together with me.
I was lost and confuse. I am sure if I tell wifey about it, she will give me the support I need. However, at that moment, piggy was having her exmaination week and we were not in talking term.
Ha..so kannina coincident. I had been sending her sms and msn. Well, all I wanted was to motivate her, let her know I was with her despite the misunderstanding. I felt she needed my support. Maybe it was love that kept me believe in it. Believing that she will smile at my messages.
Just a pity, that was all single sided communication from me. Many sms sent, but she seldom replied. Slowly I started to believe she was finding me a nuisance than smiling at my messages. I do admit, sometime I wanted her reply badly. I needed her reponse and her support too..
I did let her know I was tired at certain day but not the cause. I was tired by what decision to make. It was a mental stress. There were people interviewing me. Trying to sway my decision. Dae... How I hope you can be there with me, listen to me, hug me. I need you.
It was a difficult week. My superiors were giving me chance to reconsider each time I made my decision. I did hint you once, parting is difficult but memory is nice and you thought it was referring to us. I didn't come to you as and when I like. Just that at that moment, I was in a sea of confusion and uncertainty.
Now I have made my decision and it is final. I will be leaving MSL after so many years with the company. Frankly, that requires lot of courage. Dae, I really hope you were there to advise me instead of telling me to mind my own business. I was sad to hear that...
Those weeks were not easy for me...
Mentally I was quite tired. I had been thinking about it again and again weighting the pros and cons on the possible outcomes. To be honest, I needed view points from people who are closed to me. I needed their advises and importantly their support.
I might be wrong or I might be correct. I thought I needed an answer. As my stress became intense, I realised, all I needed was a supportive voice. Someone who could understand me, willing to walk together with me.
I was lost and confuse. I am sure if I tell wifey about it, she will give me the support I need. However, at that moment, piggy was having her exmaination week and we were not in talking term.
Ha..so kannina coincident. I had been sending her sms and msn. Well, all I wanted was to motivate her, let her know I was with her despite the misunderstanding. I felt she needed my support. Maybe it was love that kept me believe in it. Believing that she will smile at my messages.
Just a pity, that was all single sided communication from me. Many sms sent, but she seldom replied. Slowly I started to believe she was finding me a nuisance than smiling at my messages. I do admit, sometime I wanted her reply badly. I needed her reponse and her support too..
I did let her know I was tired at certain day but not the cause. I was tired by what decision to make. It was a mental stress. There were people interviewing me. Trying to sway my decision. Dae... How I hope you can be there with me, listen to me, hug me. I need you.
It was a difficult week. My superiors were giving me chance to reconsider each time I made my decision. I did hint you once, parting is difficult but memory is nice and you thought it was referring to us. I didn't come to you as and when I like. Just that at that moment, I was in a sea of confusion and uncertainty.
Now I have made my decision and it is final. I will be leaving MSL after so many years with the company. Frankly, that requires lot of courage. Dae, I really hope you were there to advise me instead of telling me to mind my own business. I was sad to hear that...
Those weeks were not easy for me...
posted by dae at Monday, July 20, 2009
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